I’ve been experiencing back pain for almost two weeks now. At first, I thought I’d tweaked my back doing housework, but ice, heat, and Tylenol did nothing to help the pain, which was getting worse. Finally, on Tuesday, after stepping outside to scream for a full three minutes in the hopes that that would help with the pain, I finally went to the doctor. Diagnosis: kidney stones.
I’ve heard that the pain of kidney stones is similar to that of giving birth. I really wouldn’t know, now that I am on the BEST PAINKILLERS EVER.
When I took one Tuesday afternoon all I wanted was to ease the agony in my side. I was thrilled when the pain actually went away. I was absolutely giddy with happiness. This giddiness may have been a side effect of the medication. I pretty much giggled at everything that day. Oh, and I also forgot where I lived.
The next day, Jason and I had planned on a trip to Boston. I decided I was still up for it, now that I was feeling no pain. Our first stop was the John F. Kennedy Library and Museum, which was awesome. I think. I’d like to think it was my emotional attachment to all things Kennedy that caused me to weep all the way through the museum, and not just the drugs. I broke down sobbing when I saw Bobby Kennedy’s ashtray. I’m sure that would have brought me to tears even if I wasn’t on painkillers.
We made it through the rest of the day without any other side effects, except that I confused spanikopita with baklava at the Greek deli in Quincy Market. Imagine my surprise when I bit in to the phyllo dough expecting walnuts and honey and getting a mouthful of spinach and feta. I have to imagine it myself, because I honestly didn’t notice the difference until Jason told me I had spinach in my teeth.
Thursday brought about the Hebron Fair. I had tried to forego painkillers for this event to see if I had passed the stone yet, but my howling with every footstep was distracting the other patrons, so I took another pill. We proceeded to watch the best demolition derby ever, which was strange, because usually those things bore me to death. One car was painted to look like a Holstein! I chuckled for hours thinking of that guy. Moooo!
At one point, Jason clocked me in the head by accident with the folding chairs he was carrying. I didn’t feel a thing.
The doctor says I should pass the stone within a week. Jason says it can’t happen soon enough. What ever. Wait. Where am I?
I’ve heard that the pain of kidney stones is similar to that of giving birth. I really wouldn’t know, now that I am on the BEST PAINKILLERS EVER.
When I took one Tuesday afternoon all I wanted was to ease the agony in my side. I was thrilled when the pain actually went away. I was absolutely giddy with happiness. This giddiness may have been a side effect of the medication. I pretty much giggled at everything that day. Oh, and I also forgot where I lived.
The next day, Jason and I had planned on a trip to Boston. I decided I was still up for it, now that I was feeling no pain. Our first stop was the John F. Kennedy Library and Museum, which was awesome. I think. I’d like to think it was my emotional attachment to all things Kennedy that caused me to weep all the way through the museum, and not just the drugs. I broke down sobbing when I saw Bobby Kennedy’s ashtray. I’m sure that would have brought me to tears even if I wasn’t on painkillers.
We made it through the rest of the day without any other side effects, except that I confused spanikopita with baklava at the Greek deli in Quincy Market. Imagine my surprise when I bit in to the phyllo dough expecting walnuts and honey and getting a mouthful of spinach and feta. I have to imagine it myself, because I honestly didn’t notice the difference until Jason told me I had spinach in my teeth.
Thursday brought about the Hebron Fair. I had tried to forego painkillers for this event to see if I had passed the stone yet, but my howling with every footstep was distracting the other patrons, so I took another pill. We proceeded to watch the best demolition derby ever, which was strange, because usually those things bore me to death. One car was painted to look like a Holstein! I chuckled for hours thinking of that guy. Moooo!
At one point, Jason clocked me in the head by accident with the folding chairs he was carrying. I didn’t feel a thing.
The doctor says I should pass the stone within a week. Jason says it can’t happen soon enough. What ever. Wait. Where am I?
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